Conspire

Over the weekend, I got a call from a customer who had just bought a new computer because his old one got slammed by spyware, trojans, and other bad files and crashed.  He got the brand spanking new one home, and within 2 hours of getting on the internet crashed the new one.

Seems like if you crash one computer, then you would stay away from the websites that you had visited before.  Ya know?  Not this guy, he insisted that the company I work for was responsible.  Said we were letting those things through, when we were supposed to be protecting him.  Um, sure.

~~~~~~~

Another strange one I got, was a couple who were gone away for the weekend, wanting us to disconnect their internet for the weekend.  They left their kids home alone, and didn’t want them loggin on the internet.

Later, one of my coworkers got a call from a couple of teenagers wanting to know why their internet had been shut off.

It was the same account.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

But the strangest one so far was the lady who called wanting to know why we turned Obama’s speech off the TV.  She claimed the CIWF (company i work for) was conspiring against Obama, and her TV had better go off for the same amount of time when McCain was speaking.

Yeppers, its all a big conspiracy.

Stop

Male Customer- so, where are you from originally?

Me- I’m from the southeast

MC- I thought you were from somewhere way southern than Michigan

Me- yeah, that accent gives me away everytime

MC- That’s ok, I like it

Me- Thanks.  I get that a lot, especially from male customers

MC- I can see why

Me- I think its the whole ‘southern belle’ thing.

MC- Um, yeah, you don’t really want me to go there right now…..

Me- I don’t think my husband wants you to go there.

MC- We won’t tell him

Letter,

Dear customer,

I am sincerely sorry about your computer issues, but I promise you they are not my fault.  I tell people to plug the  ethernet cord into the back of their  computer all day long, every day I work, and have not EVER had it cause a computer to crash.  While I am sure you do in fact run a virus check on your computer every day, there was no need to bite my head off when I suggested maybe you had a virus.  When I assured you that plugging the ethernet cord into your computer could in no way cause your computer to crash, I was telling you the truth, and I do in fact know what I’m doing as far as the internet goes.

I truly hope you can recover the files lost by your computer when it dumped the memory, but I am positive that I will in no way be paying for it.  And I’m pretty darn sure that my company won’t be paying for it either.  Oh, and that supervisor you wanted to talk to, he can’t do a living thing more than I can.  Sorry.

I apologized a dozen times, and meant every one of them, but when you talke to the computer manufacturor, they will tell you and ethernet cord will not crash a computer.

Sincerely,

your customer service representative.

randomage

In about 20 minutes, my Stud man will be 41 years old.  I can hear him in the living room now, sneezing his head off.  such a nice way to start off your birthday.

Remember the other night when I wrote about one son’s streak of not getting knocked in the nethers?  The streak ended tonight.  Poor kid.  He was so proud of that streak.  Bragged about it everyday, which resulted in him being more of a target.  I guess you could say he was asking for it.  Cause he sure was.  Worse off even, they caught him unexpectedly, and then 3 of the brothers got him in a row.

In a gas update, all the stations around had gas today.  Making it IMPOSSIBLE to travel around town.  Every where I tried to go today, the roads were backed up unbeliveably.  I pulled into the grocery store, and nearly got ran over 3 times because the gas line was winding through their parking lot. No one was willing to give an inch to let me through to park.  Anytime I would see some space to move through, that car would suddenly wake up, smell the coffee and surge forward to block me from making progress.   If we hadn’t been out of EVERYTHING edible, I would have just turned around and went home.  Instead, I keept inching forward until I finally got to park and buy some food.  Sheesh people.

Son2 found out tonight what it is like to bump an elbow that had surgery 3.5 weeks ago.  It’s not nice. They still aren’t letting him throw, and hopefully, if he’s good, he can start hitting next week.  He is so excited to pick up a bat again.  It’s been driving him insane to not be able to even touch a baseball or bat.

Why can’t my brain shut down at a decent hour?  I get off work, then spend the next 3-4 hours trying to make it shut down and go sleepy bye.  i guess it would help if I wouldn’t get such difficult calls right before I get off huh.  Ok, so, here’s the deal, if you are having internet issues, don’t call the support line until morning.  That way, I can start the brain shut down early, and get some sleep at night.  K?

Warning

I need to write a new post.  I know that, but you know what.  I’m tired.  I have to get up early, take Stud to work, and then take Son2 to PT.

A few more warnings, just from my personal experience at work….. don’t by a mac, don’t use vista, and don’t go wireless.  Definitely don’t combine two of them and expect your internet to work.

trust me on this.

I am a professional.

HA!

Oh, did I mention today’s my birthday?

I’m 40.

Happy Birthday to me.

Tips

Can I ask a question?

Is it too difficult for people to make sure their computer and hardware is plugged up before calling for tech support?  I had two people, two different calls, where the people didn’t have their equipment plugged in.  Now, how do you do that?  How do you look at a modem and not see that its on? Its not hard to tell, either the lights are green or they aren’t.  Simple.

I just wanted to pass on a few tips for when calling up tech support for anything, phone, internet, cable, computer, anything at all.  Ok.

1st- don’t assume the tech automatically knows your information.  Just because you give it to the automated computer person, doesn’t mean it was passed on to the tech.

2nd- If the tech asks you to do something, then do it.  Don’t refuse. Just assume they know more than you, and do it.

3rd- don’t ask for a supervisor.  Supervisor’s can’t do anything more than the tech can.

4th- don’t cop an attitude with the tech. He or she can’t help you are having trouble.

5th- don’t assume the tech is ignorant.

6th- if you have been disconnected because of not paying your bill, don’t yell at the tech.  Tech’s can’t help it if you don’t pay your bill on time.

Remember, the tech knows you are having trouble, or you wouldn’t be calling in the first place.  They are doing the best they can, and if they can’t resolve the issue, then they will schedule someone to come to your house.  Don’t lose your temper, just calmly do what is suggested.  And please, before you call, make sure the stinking power is plugged in.

Drunk?

I had a caller tonight, that kind of stunned me.  SHE accused me of being drunk.  She also accused me of faking my accent.

Can I help it if she’s a yankee and can’t understand me?  I can’t help it if she was born and raised in the north.  I also can’t help it if she hasn’t ever been exposed to a lilting southern accent such as mine.  Totally not my fault.

She still requested to be transferred to someone not drunk.

On the other hand, I have had several male callers comment on my accent and what a joy it was to listen to.  One caller even told me it would only take him about 4-6 hours to get to my location from his.  I told him I didn’t think Stud would appreciate that too much, he sent Stud the message that he was a lucky man to get to listen to me talk all the time.  I dont’ think Stud finds my accent charming.

Maybe him and the woman need to compare notes.

Not much.

I just had the worst night of work ever.  Considering I’ve only been on the p hones a week, that doesn’t really say much, but still.  I think the entire eastern seaboard’s internet went out tonight.  I really do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A little levity for the night:

sitting in the pre-op room with Son2 last week:

Nurse (to me) : and who are you?

Me: his mom

Nurse: OH?  I thought maybe older sister.

Son2- no, she’s mom

Stud: She just had him at a REALLY young age!

Nurse gives me the eye. while I protest that no, I was actually 23 when son2 was born.  Stud on the other hand was rolling because he just insinuated I was a loosey goosey when I was young.